Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Toilet here, toilet there, toilet, toilet everywhere…

I think that princess feels as though her world must revolve around toilets, newly toilet trained, every time we leave or arrive anywhere “do you need to pee?” is the first communication. Check your dignity at the door, toddlers are all about bodily functions and tantrums! (Obviously innocent comments of observation and an out pouring of love is also thrown into the toddlers bubbled universe.) Thankfully princess has happily accepted that our 2 bathrooms have 2 toilets, 1 in each we do not use. My motherhood instinct tells me that explaining that a bidet is used to wash your bottom after a number 2 is sure to result in mummy cleaning water off the ceiling and constant requests from daughter to do more poos (so she can have water play)! So, for now, the second toilets are broken…




There are not too many public toilets around and it would be extremely rare to find a public toilet at a park. Most of the restaurants have a small toilet, and just like in Australia, it is good manners to only use them if you have purchased something from the premises. Public toilets are mostly neat and you are charged between 40c and 50c to use them, 20 c for a urinal (men get all the brakes)! I experienced a phobia moment when using a public toilet at a train station (usually no fear of public toilets apart from a Malaysian outhouse hole in the ground, fly ridden experience I never want to relive), so I deposited money in the slot, door opened and I am greeted by steel box, wet from ceiling to floor, a corroding body smell, with no toilet paper to boot. “Hubby and daughter did this before me, you can do it!” I tell myself. After a mild panic that I would not escape alive as all the instructions are in Italian, I took the action always warned not to do; “Don’t push the red button!” so I did then sprinted for freedom. (Alright a little over dramatic you may say but you had to be there.) You would be happy to know that hygiene conscious Italy usually have buttons on the floor to push with your foot to flush the toilet. In this particular case I think that I would have used my foot to flush the toilet even if the button was on top of the top of the toilet. I am not touching anything unnecessarily are you crazy! As the door closed behind me, I could hear water spraying from all angles in an attempt for the toilet to be sanitised before its next victim. (or perhaps just leaking pipes from the toilet next door?) I did not return to investigate. Another incident not to be spoken of again.




There are positives to my flush tales; as mentioned earlier, Italian appear to be pretty clean and sanitary conscious. Larger toilets in shopping centres in Milan all seem to have ‘foot flushes’ (do not quote me on the lingo) or automatic flushes and spray for cleaning seats. I have even experienced toilets with harnessed seats mounted to the wall so you can hang your baby (just as you would hang your handbag) as you go about your business. I have experienced toilet seats that automatically lift (which is interesting to try and keep down while trying to place a toddler on top) and involves many limbs and a couple of close calls “Mummy I am falling!!” “Mummy why is my bottom wet?”




99% of all basins and soap dispensers are censored and the other day to dry my hands I placed them into a box where they were blown from all angles. I realise that I am making it sound as though I only ever used an 'outbox' when I lived down under; I was aware how toilets worked before I visited Milan, just a bit more observant being somewhere different I guess. Oh and I would love to tell you which way the water flushes here, but just checked at my house and the water just went straight down, then refilled??? There must be further investigation...

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