Man flu is a belittling term that refers to the idea that when many men have a cold, they exaggerate and claim they have the flu — the implication being that women do not do so.
So I am feeling a little guilty that after all of my "Ohhhhh, he has man flu" jokes aimed at my husband have come back and sneezed in my face. My loving husband returned from the doctors yesterday to inform me that he now has the week off w
ork, as well as a severe case of tonsillitis, (which I guess explains the raging temperatures, body aches and fact he has not been able to swallow for the last week). I have now accepted that men do not 'moan' when they have Man-Flu, they just emit involuntary groans of agony that are entirely in proportion to the unbearable pain they are in, ("sorry for doubting the severity of your pain sweety"). My dairy intolerant husband has also been advised by his doctor, ('apparently'; notice my fingers doing the bunny rabbit sign above my head as I speak?), to have a diet of soothing cold gelati, yogurt or cold mashed potato over the next few days until antibiotics kick in. Now my husband is able to smile at me with sweet retribution in his eyes, (Oh dairy intolerant man shall have his day of revenge, haaaa haaa haaa haaa haa ha!)
ork, as well as a severe case of tonsillitis, (which I guess explains the raging temperatures, body aches and fact he has not been able to swallow for the last week). I have now accepted that men do not 'moan' when they have Man-Flu, they just emit involuntary groans of agony that are entirely in proportion to the unbearable pain they are in, ("sorry for doubting the severity of your pain sweety"). My dairy intolerant husband has also been advised by his doctor, ('apparently'; notice my fingers doing the bunny rabbit sign above my head as I speak?), to have a diet of soothing cold gelati, yogurt or cold mashed potato over the next few days until antibiotics kick in. Now my husband is able to smile at me with sweet retribution in his eyes, (Oh dairy intolerant man shall have his day of revenge, haaaa haaa haaa haaa haa ha!)So I waltz into the kitchen ten minutes after my dairy intolerant, dairy consuming husband, to be greeted by a waft of his revenge. It is now that I decide this apartment is not big enough for all our noses and floating germs; time to spread our wings; hope for a quick recovery; and book our next holiday with the windows down!!! I spend 2 hours on the Internet sourcing a long weekend away. I am thinking 2 nights in Biot in southeastern France, (on the top of a hill overlooking the Mediterranean, situated between Canne and Nice and 40 minutes drive out of Monaco). Then a third night stay in San Remo on the Italian Riviera, (2 1/2 hour drive back to Milan from here). Monday is a public holiday, so I have sourced (not booked) some great and cheap accommodation on last minute.com and I go to bed tired, but feeling very proud of myself. As I climb into bed, I remember telling my husband earlier to sleep facing away from me as I did not want him breathing his germs on me... revenge again... instead I get the dairy intolerant after affects keeping me warm all evening. I promise never to tease a man about illness again!!
I wake ready to surprise my family with my master holiday plans; but I am greeted in the morning by a daughter who is coughing like she has just smoked a pack of Marlboro red cigarettes; a husband who looks like he is performing some sort of body wave break dance move every time he tries to swallow; and a son who has yellow secretions oozing from his nose, eyes and out of his left ear. After the morning nappy change, (son definately has all of the orifices covered today), perhaps now is not the time for a holiday?
After a trip to the doctors, over 100€ later, and a dose of antibiotics for his middle ear infection, we walk home slowly via the boutiques, patisseries and cobblestone streets. I am still in amazement that this is where we live now. We are extremely lucky to be 
able to live this lifestyle and our only sadness is that the children will not remember these beautiful things and experiences that are surrounding us. No official holiday this weekend; we will get to know our local streets of Milan and holiday at home. There is nothing more heart breaking than seeing your loved ones ill. I am hoping for a quick recovery for my family, and I am hoping to not confuse the pharmacy and medication distribution centre that has now become my kitchen bench. Maybe the spirit of Halloween will brighten their moods, sweets always create cheer amongst the Gonzalez clan, and we may even try our hand at a pumpkin lantern?
able to live this lifestyle and our only sadness is that the children will not remember these beautiful things and experiences that are surrounding us. No official holiday this weekend; we will get to know our local streets of Milan and holiday at home. There is nothing more heart breaking than seeing your loved ones ill. I am hoping for a quick recovery for my family, and I am hoping to not confuse the pharmacy and medication distribution centre that has now become my kitchen bench. Maybe the spirit of Halloween will brighten their moods, sweets always create cheer amongst the Gonzalez clan, and we may even try our hand at a pumpkin lantern?
No comments:
Post a Comment